Do you remember the pain of losing your heart?
Do you remember the pain of the tears burning your skin?
Because I do.
People would keep asking me why there is always sadness in my words? For few seconds, I would remember your face and I would close my eyes fearing that you would escape my memory and I would be lost forever. Then, nothing. I would have no answer to their question. My emotions were meant to be sad. My love for you was meant to be soundless or maybe drowned in the darkness. Maybe, it was meant to be unfulfilled.. unfinished, or maybe timeless.
I am a sad person.
I remember you every night when everything becomes slow and my heart starts beating faster. I remember you when my eyes only see darkness. My memories would escape me to embrace you. Do you know why I hate that space of nothingness between life and death? That moment of doubt; when your heart is still beating but your eyes are closing. I hate it because at that moment all I can see flashing before my eyes is our untamed moments; the details of the seconds in your face and the silence you hide in your eyes. I hate it because at that limitless moment, I remember how much we loved and how much we lost.
I am a sad person.
I am the writer who writes only about sorrow. I am the one with an ocean heartache. I am the woman, who cannot escape the waves and the one drowning on the shore.
Do you remember me? Because I don’t want to be forgotten. I don’t want to be alone. I hope whenever you close your eyes, you would remember me. You would see me, a wild flower, waiting but never ending. A wild flower by the wind, through the stars.
Then, you would remember… you would remember.
-Imen
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